words for the world....

please please don’t ask me to smile
after all i have given over to you
it is too much to pretend what i don’t feel
for the sake of your comfort
you know me, you know who i am
you know that i will put aside myself for you
in ways both small and large i forfeit me
my needs desires feelings thoughts obligations
you never knew about the people who hurt me
you never saw the tears tracing the inside of my heart
you never heard the ache and weariness of my voice
you never saw the way my body began to stumble
you never saw the uneaten meals or the endless waking nights
you never felt the trembling of my limbs
you never touched the bruises and cuts on my body
these things were always there
but you were oblivious to them
knowing caring only that i would be there for you
you will never know how much you hurt me
you will never know the depth of my love for you
you will never read these words i have conjured for you
because you do not know they are for you
because you do not really know what i am